I have to admit that I have a problem. Actually, what I really have is a rule.
And that rule is, if it’s free, then take it!
And for the most part, many of us also have that rule right?
I mean, when someone offers free concert tickets, or sporting event tickets, then we take them – no brainer!! And how many ballots do we fill out in hopes of getting a free prize?
A few years ago, my husband and I were out for a drive on a Sunday morning, when we drove by a house (not far from where we lived) that had two bright pink tub chairs out on the lawn, by the road – obviously the owner was looking to get rid of them. And as we drove by, we both commented on how cool those chairs looked. But even though they were FREE, we did not stop.
However, during the course of the day, we regularly brought those chairs up – they looked nice, they would have gone great on our back deck, etc. That night, at dinner, we had guests over. AND we brought up the chairs AGAIN! As our guests headed home, they turned and said – go back and get those chairs!!
By this point it was dark and drizzling rain, but off we went – confident that the chairs would be gone. But no!! There they were! Out of the truck we jumped and as quickly as we could, lifted the chairs into the back. I felt that we were sneaking in the dead of night, hoping no one would see us – we had become on of THOSE people!
We have loved those chairs! If I had seen an advertisement for those chairs, I would not have gone to get them, but they were FREE! My rule, right??
Rules are simply shortcuts to decision making. When you have a rule, then the brain does not need to spend any time debating what to do; does not need to waste time or resources – it simply follows that rule. And when someone is offering you free tickets to something, that’s a good thing!
But when that something FREE is not all that good for you, then it can become more of a negative thing.
Take my rule around free food – if you offer me a cupcake (for free) then I’ll take it. That’s the rule!
I learned that I had this rule around free food one day as I was walking into the kitchen at work for lunch. I had brought a magnificent lunch – leftover steak from the night before, some veggies and a small salad. I couldn’t wait to dig in. As I walked into the room, the smell of pizza being warmed in the oven hit me like a ton of bricks!
Now, I’m not a big fan of day-old pizza, and I’m definitely not eating pizza warmed up in a microwave… but pizza being crisped up in the oven??? That’s a different story!!
And then I was offered some! Oh heaven!!! But wait, I had a lunch… I did not need pizza! And so began a dialogue in my head – take it, no don’t, you don’t need it; but it smells delicious, you have a lunch; well you could save this lunch for tomorrow, DONE!
Free food – who knew that my rule about things that are free also extended to food??
In my journey to better health and vitality, that was one of those eye opening moments!
Learning, understanding and then questioning my food rules has played a huge role in redefining my relationship with food, and in fact, what I consider to be food. And since then, I have become more conscious about what I am putting in my mouth, including those things that are free.
On a recent cold and damp morning, I decided to go to Starbucks for a warm tea. As I approached the barista at the drive through window, she not only handed me my tea, but offered me a FREE chocolatey concoction. with lots of whip cream on top. So yummy looking! Apparently they had an extra that they needed to give away.
Before I could even think, I heard myself saying “no thanks” and off I drove! Wait a minute…. Did I just break my rule?? Did I just turn down free food??
That was another eye-opening moment!
I am no longer allowing my rules to define me, to hijack me. It’s no longer about things being free, but about freedom itself! And I can live with that!
